I feel a truth rolling,
a snake in my belly
learning to fly with no escape,
finding expanse
inside this bag of skin.
So long I tried
to calm its wriggle
or seek a different heaven
to soar in,
trying to tame my own creation.
Now I cry
the finite tears
of a limited sky,
feel the rough roar
of a dragon burning,
understand that destruction
is necessary
and flight essential.
No noble quest
has brought me here;
fatigue and sneering
led me to this birth,
this wicked churning.
I had my plans
for alignment,
expectations of flow,
and now this burn
runs circles
around what I knew,
leaves me helpless
and very strong,
ready to move
and knowing
there is nowhere to go.
I have feared the razing,
held myself in check
against the hot breath
with its power to injure others;
feel in this moment
how I need it
to burn my icy fear,
sizzle in my own steam.
Flight is here and now;
no future journey will save me,
no teacher offer any wisdom
different from these strong strokes
with trembling, unpracticed wings.